Connection - Peaceful Fathers

A Fathers Guide To Help You Raise Kind Children.

I will not tell you if you’re kind to your kids; they will be…

Making Real Connection With Your Kids

What has become the “normal” way of parenting has created more disconnect than we…

A Time to Build

How can we create and preserve a healthy connection with our children? We need…

The Rules Of My House

It would be great if our kids just listened! We have a big problem…

A Need For Better Fathers

In these past years, I have spent many hours speaking with good men about…

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- Fatherhood
- October 7, 2020
A Need For Better Fathers

In these past years, I have spent many hours speaking with good men about becoming better fathers. These have been some of the best conversations of my life. My strategy comes from the philosophy of peaceful parenting. This is much different from the traditional methods that our parents raised most of us and how many raise their kids now. Being a better father takes a lot of hard work and is often undervalued in today’s world. For me there was no greater path to masculinity than becoming a good father. It is challenging to break bad habits. Especially when we start examining the data and environment, we are creating in our home. Most parents are on the authoritative side of things, with almost 90% of parents still spanking their child as a form of discipline. It is easy to ignore all the studies and all the negative outcomes attributed to spanking your child, but it is painful to face the truth. Ask your child how it feels at that moment, what they were thinking and what did they learn. Imagine if we asked the person we were striking with our hands how this made them feel and owning those actions,...
- Fatherhood
- July 1, 2020
Nothing Genuine is Easily Destroyed

In a previous post that I wrote for The Forge of Men, I explained about how you are raising the next “Nice Guy.” I explained how ineffective and abusive parenting methods cause us to raise a boy that becomes detached from his own needs to gain acceptance from his parents. He quickly learns that if he is good, people will like him, and the Nice Guy is created. This child will be depressed, suffer sickness, and lack confidence because everything he has done was for someone else. There is no real attachment to a true identity. In adulthood, this man unknowingly displays weakness and avoids any conflict to be recognized as friendly. Only so long can he suppress his true desires and instincts without the outward projection of being an asshole. It is a struggle to live in the shadows. The faults of admiration. What about the other boy who seems confident and is admired by everyone? If you take away this admiration, and he too suffers greatly. This is another example of how our parenting methods can have adverse effects on our boys when we stay trapped in traditional parenting methods. It is often difficult to think back to,...
- Fatherhood
- August 13, 2020
POWER WORKS EASILY ON THE ONES WHO DEPEND ON YOU

There are many reasons why a father will struggle to accept the realities of the relationship he has with his children. It can be overwhelming to find acceptance when your constant desire for authority is creating continuous conflicts. It will help if you compare any immoral behaviors to the standards in all the other relationships you’ve come to value in your life. It takes a courageous man to look at himself and admit he is not using the best parenting methods. You can get trapped in traditional parenting ideas that guide you to unsatisfactory results and inevitably cause more pain between you and your child. You will resort to punishments or rewards to maintain your authority. This never works and is ineffective because it destroys any attempt with communicating and problem-solving. It creates an untrustworthy home full of dishonesty and deception. Your go-to parenting phrases are now “I’m doing this for your own good,” “Because I said so,” and “I’m the boss.” Phrases like these should be seen for what they are, lazy and mean. As men, we should call out other fathers who resort to such weak language and encourage each other to be better. These are conversations most,...